dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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