The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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