The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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