Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
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I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
