Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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