Where are you?
In a non slutty way
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
It's never too late to be topless.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
