she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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