i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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