I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize
