She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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