its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
