I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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