I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
