Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
