South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
