I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize