Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he shaved USA in his pubs
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize