I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize