there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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