The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
