the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize