She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
my poor anus
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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