The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
