This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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