just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
