I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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