Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize