What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
You're a waste of cheezeits
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
