Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
