meet me or not, i'm out of control
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
