I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
