He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
