My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
