I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
