I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Randomize
