Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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