oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
