There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize