me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
so let's talk penis.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
