Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize