It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
