Someone shit on the floor
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize