but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
