why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
