When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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