As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
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