I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Randomize
