She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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