you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
