Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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