We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i came on her dog
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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